Age and its effect on marriage

4:16:47

2023-09-16

1818

Age is considered one of the important matters in marital life, and a factor in its continuation. Who among us has not heard of divorce incidents between spouses, due to the difference in ages between them, and although the issue of age is a relative matter, it plays a major role in whether or not marriages continue. A young man who marries a younger girl often takes her for an instinctive purpose only. You see a 25-year-old young man marrying a 15-year-old girl, and when we ask why? We see that what we have proposed is clear and intuitive because the mental difference between them is very large, and the factor of understanding is non-existent (or variable and minimal).

We say: It is an illusion, not love, because when a young man is attracted to the girl’s beauty and femininity - and this often happens, especially in our time - he imagines that he loves her, but! If he stays away from her for a short time, he will forget her very quickly, especially if he sees another girl who is more beautiful than her, so he will leave the first and become attached to the second. From here, it is clear that the main motive for this matter is instinct and the illusion of love (not love itself). We often find the owners of these marriages among those who are not cultured and educated (a relative matter) and in the age of twenty or younger, as they consider that the young girl continues to give instinctively for a long time. But the cultured, educated, and over twenty (also, it is a relative matter) knows what love is and who he loves, so he does not choose teenage girls (because they only know its name) and his goal in marriage is higher than instinct. But if we look at a couple who are close in age, we see that their lives are dominated by affection, harmony, understanding, and love. Because in terms of reason, minds are close, and in terms of understanding, opinions are in proportion. From the standpoint of love, the hearts are harmonious and harmonious, and from the standpoint of instinct, the effervescence of youth is the same (and as they grow older, the increase remains the same). As for the one who marries someone who is older than him, he has dug his own grave, because a twenty-year-old young man who marries a thirty-year-old girl, after ten years, the woman begins to enter menopause while he is still in the youthful spree, then he begins to search for relationships. External marriage, whether permanent or intermittent, which may cause a crisis with his wife that may lead to divorce.

As for love, sometimes these marriages include it from both parties, but this love quickly disappears in the face of innate instinctive desires, and it may continue, however! What man remains without sex for a long period of time? What woman would accept her husband having sex with another woman? Who says: The Prophet (may God’s prayers and peace be upon him and his family) married Lady Khadija (peace be upon her) and she was older than him? We answer him: Whoever can be like the Prophet should do so, and the Prophet married nine women, while we are not allowed to do so, and this is an analogy with a difference.