12:50:19 
2023-06-14 
390
Imagine a woman named Megan shopping at the supermarket with her five-year-old son, Kyle. As they wait in line to checkout, Kyle sees a go-kart on a shelf and asks his mother to buy it for him.
"Please, Mom?" he says, smiling with his most charming smile. " you can keep my next allowance?"
Megan sighs and replies, "Kyle, you allready borrowed from the allowance so you don't get any money until next month. No games today."
However, Kyle did not give up easily, so he takes the car and puts it firmly in front of the box with the purchases, saying, while holding his arms on his chest and highlighting his chin: (I want it).
I said no, Kyle.
Megan was starting to get angry. Kyle's voice rose as did hers and the other shoppers seemed to turn to them and watch what was going on between them.
If you don't behave right away, you won't get any ice cream after dinner tonight.
Kyle yelled, "I don't care about the disgusting ice cream. I want the car, and I want it now! You're evil. You don't ever let me have anything!"
And Kyle started screaming angrily, and everyone watched what was happening between them. Kyle's face was red and covered in tears as Megan wanted the earth to split open and swallow her.
"Well, you can have the car," she said in a whispering voice to her son, holding his elbow. "Just shut up!"
It is now certain that you will not surrender to your child in this way. But think of your friends and neighbors who might. What did Kyle learn from his mother's behavior? There is a good chance he will continue to ignore the boundaries you set and throw tantrums if he doesn't get what he wants because he knows she will give in.
Parents spoil their children because they love them. Parents tolerate their children and fail to abide by the limits because they love them. But spoiling children dose not teach them any useful, long-term skills. Rather, children learn selfishness, manipulate the feelings of others, and disrespect their needs. You may enjoy giving your children gifts and delicacies, and you may find it difficult to persevere and insist when they cross the limits, and you may also think that discipline is unkind. But is it in your children's long-term interest to be spoiled to the point of corruption? Do you have to hold them accountable for their actions?
Facts:
Dr. Daniel Siegel says that a kind of metronome is triggered in the child's brain when he hears the word "yes" and his brain hits the brakes when he hears the word "no". Logical boundaries help the child develop emotional control that enables him to regulate his impulses and impulses and to act in appropriate ways.
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