Dr. Abbas Mahmoud Makki,
a graduate and holder of a State Doctorate in Clinical and Abnormal Psychology from the Sorbonne University, Paris, France. University professor, behavioral and administrative training expert, and specialist in psychological, psychotherapy, and family counseling.

First: Manifestations of Neglect

1. Material Neglect

• Clothing
• Food
• Security

2. Emotional Neglect

• Safety and security
• Sense of belonging
• Status and position
• Self-affirmation and narcissistic needs

3. Field Observations

Some statistics indicate that both material and emotional neglect often affect poorer groups, while emotional neglect tends to be the predominant characteristic among affluent families. Material prosperity may cause parents to neglect the emotional attention required by their children, as though money automatically facilitates everything—reflecting a kind of “robotic civilization.”

On the other hand, material hardship or poverty may practically and situationally hinder parents' ability to provide emotional compensation for material neglect. Relationships between poor parents and their children are often characterized by aggression and tension, as a result of patterns of behavior involving the release of frustration, compensation, and taking revenge on the other person who accompanies us in our daily lives.

4. The Overlap and Distinction Between Neglect (la négligence) and Abandonment (l'abandon)

It is important to recognize both the overlap and the distinction between neglect (la négligence) and abandonment (l'abandon).

Neglect is primarily a material behavior and refers to a failure to fulfill one's responsibilities or duties.

Abandonment, on the other hand, is an attitude or position that is supported by behavior that gives it meaning. Sometimes abandonment may exist only as a feeling and may not actually be true or real. Neglect, however, is an observable behavior that is clear and indisputable.

The feeling of abandonment can become a deep foundation for developing a depressive or needy psychological state. In both cases, we are dealing with an unhealthy psychological situation.

This is the major challenge faced by the neglected child when he or she moves from neglect to a feeling of abandonment, particularly when the boundaries become blurred between actual psychological injustice and a deeply felt or imagined sense of victimization.

Second: Effects of Neglect

1. Material Effects

• Academic failure.
• Poor health.
• Declining achievement in various areas of behavior and performance.
• Daily family conflict and material struggles within family life.

2. Emotional Effects

• Moving from neglect to feelings of abandonment and loneliness.
• Withdrawal into oneself.
• Aggression toward others and society: demonstrative or retaliatory aggression—“You neglected me, and now it is time for you to pay.” Weakness is transformed into strength.
• Aggression toward oneself, leading to psychological distress and behavioral deviance.
• Family disintegration arising from feelings of injustice and discrimination.
• Fear of confrontation and self-isolation in the absence of support.
• Lack of guidance or a reliable authority figure and fear of achievement.
• Anxiety and emptiness, which seek compensation, often in negative ways.
• Attempting to compensate for neglect by holding someone who was not responsible for the neglect accountable: the oppressed taking revenge on someone other than the oppressor.

Third: Why Does Neglect Occur?

Neglect is not necessarily a deliberate decision. Rather, it is a daily behavioral reality shaped by the general attitudes of parents on the one hand and the family and social environment on the other.

A. Chaotic Environment

The disorder of the surrounding environment and its inability to accommodate the needs of individuals.

B. Absence of Institutions

The absence of institutions concerned with children, or the ineffectiveness of the educational and preparatory philosophies adopted by such institutions.

C. Absence of Parents

Parents may be absent because of death, abduction, negligence, or failure to assume responsibility.

D. Lack of Family Planning

The absence of proper planning for the family.

E. Financial Hardship

Limited financial resources, poverty, and the inability to provide children's basic necessities.

F. Conflict Between Parents' Desires and the Child's Needs

The desires, impulses, and narcissistic tendencies of parents may take precedence over the child's wishes and basic needs.

Parents may consider their own evening gatherings more important than attending to the child's needs, such as training, feeding, or helping the child sleep through storytelling and conversation.

G. Lack of Awareness

A lack of awareness that having children means making a decision to raise and build individuals who will become members of society, rather than merely responding to a temporary impulse.

The child may consequently be treated as though he or she can simply be “cancelled” retroactively.

H. Confusion Between Age Groups

The boundaries between different age groups become blurred. The child is not allowed to live according to his or her own age, while parents attempt to live their own lives through their children.

The result is a society dominated by feelings of grievance, neglect, and abandonment, creating strained relationships between generations.

Fourth: Treatment

1. Prevention First

The first step is to address the causes mentioned above. This can only be achieved through family planning concerning having children, not by limiting the number of children, but by adopting an effective and constructive reproductive and educational policy.

Such an approach can protect children from neglect, and consequently from feelings of abandonment, while helping society avoid aggression and conflict between social classes and generations.

2. Awareness of the Reality of Neglect

There must be awareness of both material and emotional neglect. This requires identifying and diagnosing the forms of neglect through the joint involvement of society, parents, and children.

3. Timely Compensation

Where possible, the effects of neglect should be addressed and compensated for at the appropriate time and without delay. This prevents feelings of resentment, compensation, and retaliation from becoming more deeply rooted—especially when the person being held accountable is not actually responsible for the neglect.

4. Establishing and Developing Institutions

Institutions should be established and developed to address both the material and emotional manifestations of neglect.

Awareness alone is not enough; the actual circumstances and problems must also be addressed.

Fifth: Conclusion

• Neglect may be real or imagined.
• Neglect may be material or emotional.
• Neglect may occur in wealthy families as well as poor families.
• Neglect may be unintentional, voluntary, or deliberate.
• Depending on the specific circumstances of each case, neglect may result in withdrawal or aggression.

In all circumstances, neglect must be addressed whenever it occurs. Addressing it requires dealing with all the aspects mentioned above in order for treatment to be effective.