Envy is an emotion which "occurs when a person lacks another's superior quality, achievement, or possession and either desires it or wishes that the other lacked it.
Now many people confuse envy with jealousy so let’s get that cleared out first before we move on.
The main difference between envy and jealousy is that envy is the emotion of craving what someone else has, while jealousy is the emotion related to fear that something you have will be taken away by someone else.
Envy is the emotion when you want a possession someone else has.
Jealousy is the emotion when you fear you may be replaced in the affection of someone you love or desire.
Now what causes envy? Why do we envy?
We all feel envious from time to time, no matter how much we want to believe we’re above it. Envy is a complex collection of feelings that stems from a very basic desire: You want what someone else has.
The vast majority of individuals will envy a friend at some point in their lives. Researches have even found out that most of us actually tend to envy our friends, though some not as severe or for big matters as others
Now here are seven reasons why we envy.
Money matters. It can ruin a friendship if one friend brings in or has access to plenty of money, with extra to spare, while another barely makes end meet. Here envy will happen for sure.
If your closest friend is in a romantic relationship and you’re sitting there at work looking at him smiling at his phone when he texts her, envy happens right there.
The envious guy wonders whyyyy? Is it because he is better looking? Because he has a better job? Etc.
I’ve seen this one happen many times. You have two very close friends about the same age, one gets pregnant and delivers the baby and months go by and her friend is still not pregnant. Will the non-pregnant girl feel 100 percent happy for her friend? We love our friends, of course, but if the non-pregnant girl can’t get pregnant, the tiny envious part of her would feel better if her friend couldn’t get pregnant either.
He looks better than me. He gets girls, I don’t. Everyone compliments his looks, I don’t get any compliments.
Oh my God Sarah eats all day and never gets fat! I’m on a strict diet and still weight 200 pounds. Oh my God look at how fit she is. For people who feel bad about their weight, having a close friend who is thin can trigger deep envy.
Men and women don’t typically envy a friend’s professional success, but having a friend in the same profession who is more successful can trigger serious envy.
A recent study found that social media can cause powerful feelings of envy. This makes sense, as individuals self-select photos of themselves at their happiest—you know when they’re traveling all around the world and taking photos everywhere. This makes the people viewing the photos to be envious.
What do some famous figures say about envy?
Malcolm X - Envy blinds men and makes it impossible for them to think clearly.
Marilyn Monroe - Success makes so many people hate you. I wish it wasn't that way. It would be wonderful to enjoy success without seeing envy in the eyes of those around you.
Buddha - Do not overrate what you have received, nor envy others. He who envies others does not obtain peace of mind.
Let’s check out some disadvantages of envy:
Now envy obviously has disadvantages but we can actually turn envy to positive and use it for our benefit, according to psychologists.
Now comes how to overcome envy
No matter how hard you try to cover it with a smile, envy isn't something that goes away on its own.
Check these methods out and see for yourself how you can overcome envy.
Celebrate the success of others. Genuinely and practically, rejoice in the fortune of others. When somebody receives something that you desire, be happy for them. If you wanted it, they probably did too. Stop viewing life as a competition.
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